Birthday Bash

I'm going in straight for the brag: I make delicious food. Humble check: the aesthetic leaves something to be desired. I don't have the same patience with cooking and baking that I do with most creative things. I focus on taste and texture, which is always the most important, but when it comes to presentation, I'm a prison mess hall slinger.

So since today is my dad's birthday (happy birthday, dad!) I... Damn it, I got boxed cake mix. I knew it was a mistake. There is literally nothing worse and something always goes wrong. Baked up, they looked fine, but it's the first time I've done carrot cake and I had no clue that I should've used parchment paper on the bottom of the pan. Needless to say, the first cake broke in half when it was time to get it out of the pan. Rather than give up, I melted the cream cheese icing and poured it over the top like a glaze instead. Realizing the second wouldn't fare better, I left it in the pan and iced it as is. There's irony here. My dad's eaten enough of my mistakes in life, so this one would literally be a piece of cake. If you've seen the frightening plates of mushed burritos and leftovers he eats, my unpretty cakes are hardly competition.

The birthday preparations weren't all bad. I did, after all, manage to wrap his gift without incident and I made a rather nice and sappy card for him. Little picture of a frazzled guy carrying the planet Earth on his back, along with the message "To the Dad/Pa-Pa who carries our world on his back and a bigger place in our hearts!". That's right, Hallmark; hit me up. I've got all the best words. 

So no more damn boxed cakes though. In my determination to plan ahead, I immediately perused pages of recipes until the ingredients and balance sounded like the real deal then printed it out.

Immediately after sitting it down, my cat She-Ra decided that was the only spot in the house worthy of her to lie on. Not only that, but she thoroughly licked herself while lying on it. After she got up, her sister-brother Seven decided it was her-his turn.

Did I tell that story already? Yeah, we thought Seven was possibly a boy cat. Then she went into heat. Yet we still kinda keep calling her a boy. I would say she's genderqueer, but there's never actually been behaviors typical of a male or female cat outside of mating. All cats are queer as fuck. That's why I love 'em.

So, that's about the start of my day. The little mini-dragons woke me up at 6AM because I forgot to close my door last night. Waking up to my cats attacking the shit out of a cardboard box full of plastic bags is not my favorite way to start the day, but at least I got the birthday prep done. I'll probably go back to sleep for a few hours then figure out the rest of the day. I did start the drafting lines for Totem last night, but I've a lot of reading on my plates too. Play this one by ear...

Love, peace and chicken grease...