I Used to Love the Rain

It wouldn't be inaccurate to say that most of us have been undergoing some pretty deep mental, and possibly physical, changes since this quarantine/social distancing thing started. There's something mentally dissident in this situation that makes it different from a vacation or a break. I'm not stupid enough to say that i feel forced or that my freedom is in question. I've always served the mentality that I'm doing my part to prevent the spread of a serious disease.

Nonetheless, there are simply consequences to my character and personality that I have had to come to grips with.

As the header up there says, I used to love the rain. Now, there is just something claustrophobic about it. When I go outside in it, it's to hide under my front porch awning. Sunny days mean days where I can walk around the yard, soak up some valuable Vitamin D and come back in a little less weighted, a lot more refreshed.

I don't take what was normal before for granted and of course, i miss it. Nonetheless, I have to be mindful of the sharp and sometimes sudden changes that used to be the subject of some fun Facebook quizzes. Now, I'm altering in such ways that I'm not always sure what brings me joy and sadness. I have to be a little less certain and a lot more flexible, have to be more aware of what brings me peace and what I am forcing too much.

Things will never be the same, but someday I may be able to love the rain. For now, it's an inconvenience. Yet with the rain comes lush green and spring flowers so I can be patient with what I can't change and even enjoy the peace of mind it later brings.