The Love Affair with Digital Drawing

I'm not sorry that I'll probably gush about my new display tablet high for a while, but I'd also like to continue to talk about the pros and cons I come across, as well as how I make lemons into lemonade.

I've talked before about how Macs, while often perfect for my needs, aren't exactly flawless. For one, any lingering updates often gum things up. My Macs are also almost a decade old so they're not exactly spring chickens. My display driver got temperamental with me a couple of times, but the fixes were easy enough that it was only a hiccup. So here are a few of those incidents:

1.  Pen stopped working, mouse worked fine- this actually wasn't just from the pen running out of juice. I switched pens and it persisted. I keep the driver option in my Dock so it's always accessible and opened it up. Without doing anything else, the pen decided to work again. I got this.
2. Mouse left click not working at all- couldn't figure this one out, even with mouse settings. Restarting fixed this one.
3. Mouse left-click works but drop menus don't stay open- this only seems to happen on the display screen. It don't want no mouse telling it what to do. Using the pen seems to be the only way it works properly. Not a huge problem, but when I'm flipping between the display and the Mac screen, it's a little inconvenient to switch around.

Not a problem if you're good at wrestling computers, but calling this a beginner's tablet is deceptive. There are some other issues I've seen people mention before but, again, nothing too distracting. Because of the extreme angles of the display as it spreads towards the edges, the parallax (that fancy word for the gap between the stylus tip and the cursor's actual place) starts to wander a bit. I don't often get anywhere near the edges anyway, and it's less than an inch of screen all around where the change is noticeable. If you're used to digital drawing, it's not unfamiliar. Hell, if you have a small mouse pad, you already know the unconscious lift and adjust fix. In this case, zoom out if you need more room for a fluid line or drag and recenter.

It's nothing like drawing on paper. However, using a digital display, especially a big one, teaches you how to adjust for that. Using a screenless tablet, I was constantly trying to turn it like paper, which does the exact opposite you think you want it to. There are certain motions in your wrist that make perfect circles more attainable, certain gestures you get used to that will need a different solution. You absolutely can rotate a digital page, especially easy if you set a rotary slide key to do so, but I've found it's better to simply train your digital hand differently, or make use of tools to utilize shape. Learn how to use vector shapes alongside freehand.

If you're a beginner, a new learning curve will usually feel like it's just making things take longer or is more difficult. The tutorials you watch will take ten minutes to show you the ins and outs of what should take a few seconds. And for an advanced user, it actually does go quicker. The things that you must do to accomplish it become auto-tasks but it takes a lot of practice and trial and error.

Artists aren't necessarily bragging when they call a complex looking piece a 'doodle'. Given, some are badly lying about how quick it was done, but a good deal of them have taken months, years, decades to achieve that kind of result. It wasn't just the ten minutes they threw down to do it, but the discipline and practice that connected the quickest routes to the problem.

It used to take me several hours just to color a picture digitally, and I'm talking just the base colors with little shading. Color basing typically never takes more than an hour for a full page piece now. The line drafting, again, generally takes me anywhere from five minutes to an hour, depending on the complexity. Shading and detailing is where artists tend to camp out most; looking at two to twenty hours for most pictures but can easily pile on to hundreds if they choose to keep playing. Customizing tools, filters and textures is another place that can wind on for a long time.

The time crunch is pretty inconsequential to how well it's done. The demands of the problem and the workflow can help, but a deadline can help or hurt the turn-out. I often toggle layers just to experiment, but don't keep them around for the final presentation. Sometimes I just want to try something out without risking the work already done. I'll duplicate shading layers if I'm tempted to overwork them, just because it's hard to come back from a shading experiment gone wrong without starting over. Best to preserve it at certain stages then hide the evidence of overwork elsewhere. Sometimes the difference is just between wanting a soft blend or a darker, starker version. I can switch between the two and decide which I like better.

Of course, there are brave artists who blend it all on one layer like you would with an actual painting. I'm never that brave. I'll keep my alternating blends separate but also flatten out the layers in a duplicate to do the final blend (catching anywhere the overlays do make multiple layers too obvious). Print will inevitably punish any of your glaring mistakes. Obviously, print only has a flat dimension so all digital paintings can't escape that one.

There are always 'better' ways of doing things. There's nothing wrong with being secure in your knowledge while maintaining an openness to learning a way better suited to the task. Beginners often get discouraged because they aren't instant prodigies. Or if they do start out successful, they don't improve because of overconfidence and rigidity in their workflow.

Being open to possible issues is a very important part of enjoying and improving digital painting. You can't just look at the big picture. There are so many steps, so many techniques, so many reasons why it's better to honestly assess what you don't like in order to avoid doing that again and again. I'm not sure why some artists are so shy about mistakes or formative work. Sharing them is a better opportunity to gain insight into taste and technique.

I'm not one for organizing videos but there are already tons out there to display the amount of work that goes into solving and optimizing a visual. Watched a particularly interesting one from a YouTube Channel called Jazza where the guy goes on Fiverr to commission people to draw particular pieces of art based on his quick sketch and it's quite interesting how some artists undersell their talents while others might be a bit overpriced, especially when they exclude certain elements asked for. It gave even me some insight into how important it is to consider the market value of what I produce. What someone pays should advertise what they can expect in the quality of work. Making that too unstable makes it more difficult to justify how much time you'll spend on a project.

Anyhoo, enough digital babbling. More to work on this weekend, both reading and drawing, but crossing my fingers it fuels my urge to write as well.

Idea Factory

There are times where I wish I could just pound out lists and lists of my ideas, that I could just be content to know I'm an influencer and let them roam free. Yet, alas, I cannot trust it and I hoard it like filthy, dirty treasure.

MY treasure

Influencers often monetize their ability to collect followers (and thereby justifying the ridiculous amount of time they spend on social media). Nothing wrong with that, but it is more like aggressive and often insincere consumerism. I wouldn't say that influencers are below integrity either-- I'm sure many will only influence something they believe in, yet with all rises in success, the temptation would also exist to lower their standards to collect on things they don't really care about. The creator in me just can't be satisfied with this passivity towards the production either way.

It's important to me that my ideas do go through some creative control. Maybe it's the obsession with being first. I don't want to be the sharing type only to decide I want to do it, yet they beat me to it. Then suddenly I look like the copycat, the fanfic hack, and the idea slams my heart into my feet. Perhaps it's possible to be an influencer and an author, but no matter how I think about it, it seems like a cycle too open to paranoia, wondering which idea I should have kept or released to the sharks.

MY tail

Having already touched on the writers that seem to want their book written for them and people who pretend to have an idea but are really farming, I won't do that again, but ideas are still, at least in the sense of the creative process, somewhat precious. (No. No Gollum picture here!) While some people get excited by an idea they can borrow or steal to carry their scene, more often than not, I find it too influential, too tragic a miss in working out the problem in a unique way (if not unique, at least organic to my own critical thought process).

In a previous post, I brought up impostor syndrome. If you're not hip to this, it's a condition that gives you the sense that your accomplishments are fraudulent, even when they are valid. Because I run into this feeling more than I'd like to admit, I try to avoid any practice that might give the negative loop grounds for feeling like a thief, a hack, a fraud. I do have an ample history with fantasy as is and often I can pinpoint some of my plots as being derivative, but I keep those influences as far from vivid as possible. I know those sorts of people who almost exclusively copy-paste or take credit for other people's work and have no shame for it. To me, it's disgusting. You won't often see a heavy bias from me, but this is one I'm unbending on.

It's not lost on me, the irony being these people almost never get a taste of impostor syndrome.

Maybe there will be a lot of my ideas lost when my life comes to a close. It's a shame, but I've never asked much from this life and ideas are one place where I tread carefully. I love to share methods, techniques, slices of life, mood management practices, fitness updates, patterns, but the times when I hoard ideas or put a price on them-- please believe that this is where artists need to assert the value of their contribution. We do give a lot away for free. I've shared crochet patterns I've made from scratch, short stories, pictures-- many of them even of quality I should be charging for. It doesn't always make perfect sense what I choose to make free and what I insist contributes to my wallet. Because so many artists do make stunning works available free, there's almost an expectation, an entitlement that something comparably better is free so yours should be too.

Ideas are a dime a dozen. Look at all the free books!

Also, MY books.

The idea that only the best should be allowed to have value is a falsehood. A free market doesn't mean nothing has value. It gives the consumer the ability to discern what to consume and the producer to decide what its worth. They often do put things out there, simply out of the need to share, their own measure of what might give them exposure and sell more of their work, but it doesn't exist to give consumers permission to undercut the value of all art. You are perfectly within your right to decide it's not worth your hard-earned money, but you are not within your right to decide its value. And yes, piracy will murder some dreams, and it will always be a problem. Your ideas exist in some form already. Your sense of humor is even dependent on someone else's ability to enjoy it (and you can just as well be the only one to enjoy it-- go, you!).

Everything is trash, everything is treasure, and you don't have to be right about which way that leans for you.

FYI: Treasure. You don't have to agree. You don't have to understand why I spent months bingeing on Homestar Runner games and toons. Strongbad, King of Town... Still my spiritual BFFs. Also, where I learned the word 'chiaroscuro'.

You've probably noticed, but I find popular authors game for examples, both positive and negative. The main reason for this is that is that their success no longer hinges on anything short of massive boycotting. Which never happens. You can hate Seeetepheeniee Meyeeer and E.L. Fudge all you want, but lack of taste will sustain them forever. Authors like Anne Rice, Stephen King, JK Rowling-- they're safely out of reach. It's much trickier either being positive or negative about the rest of us peons because I neither want to seem suspiciously undercritical nor do I have a desire to be the weed in their garden (or the wildfire-- some analogy for killing their career). When I do find time to read their work, sometimes I don't want to immediately be the critic. Sometimes I do enjoy being the consumer.

And sure, writers are SUPPOSED to look at everything with a writer's eye. We're supposed to do a lot of things, but I find most of them to be pretentious and counterproductive if you take them as gospel. Yes, take a little advice concerning the growth and cultivation of ideas, but you're doing yourself a favor sometimes just by not taking every aspect of it and turning it into work. Look, you're in a creative career. It's still about conveying emotion and passion. It's not all or nothing and your work benefits most from the balance-- be a passionate emotional person with a sharp rational brain.

I know creatives get a bad rap for being flighty and irrational. I can't tell you how relieved I am that this is totally wannabe bullshit. I ran into so many try-hard hipsters that talked a big game and produced jackshit. The productive artists, digital artists especially, are people who work with computers, technology, numbers and logic too. Some of us are ridiculously literal, critical, intolerant, stubborn. There's no political barrier either-- a mix of liberal, moderate and conservatives in many degrees. Because of this, creatives also don't have a 'type'. It's sort of just human nature to notice the loudest try-hards of any stereotype.

Kicking my ass back onto the main track though...

He's going to kick my butt.

No matter how you feel about ideas, I can always recommend plastering your existence with them. I have several apps on my tablets and computers, emails to myself, notebooks, post-its, scribbled and typed remnants of the big and small processes of ideas. Get them out. You may have a project in mind, or just want to put out the pieces that may lead to one. It doesn't really matter. Catharsis comes from release. Even when you're blocked, sometimes you're still feeding some beast that probably needs attention. Some people fear that they'll just end up starting and not finishing too much so they do nothing if not the big project. This is why I designate specific programs, ones I give myself permission to treat as generic. Sometimes, it does lead to ideas for the main project(s), but the point of an idea phase is to free it into being. Not to completion, but to some visual or tangible medium.

Which is why many idea-makers are still traditional. Pen and paper is still a good way to cheat yourself into a sense of making something, a boost in the right direction. It turns a secret into a promise, a promise into a project.

I've said this before too, but word count is trivial. While I've had spells where word count was the goal, it was only something I allowed myself if I was certain that the story was planned well enough or simple enough to be pantsed. Produce ideas first, worry about categorizing them when the need presents. Preparation is a good thing, but sometimes you do need to throw a few logs on the fire to shed some light on what comes next.

I'm going to wander off a bit since I've finished covering the branches of this topic for now. I do want to say that, despite the amount of time I spend blogging, I also spend gobs of time writing and planning and editing. I try to put update posts up so you can see accurate progression towards my projects. There are some slower spells where... well, ideas. Outlines. Planning. The word count is a nice little package, but it hardly delves into the process of accumulating it. It's not a mark of confidence. People do attach bragging rights to it and it IS exciting, but it's not the greatest measure of your effort. Connecting your ideas will be the silent victor and one that you work to share eventually.

Happy manufacturing, my word engineers!