A History of my Personal Doll Collection

 Out of curiosity, I looked at my order history on AliExpress to track when and what I ordered and was actually quite shocked to see I didn’t even begin to buy my larger dolls until late 2019! I thought maybe I’d accumulated them over a few years, but no, not even two years since I began. It’s startling just because of how much I’ve put into the journey, how much I’ve learned and progressed. If you know me, though, you also know I forever underestimate just how much I absorb and do when very passionate about something.

The first thing I bought was a Bomelon head, female, grey eyes, pink lips. I remember the first large doll I wanted to try was going to be my project to create my character Rienna. I though the Bomelon bodies looked generic so I didn’t buy the body right away. I actually ended up finding a company called DreamFairy and I liked the bodies but not so much the heads. 

I didn’t know much about the differences in scales and that the heads didn’t fit but this was also part of the reason I wanted to start with a cheaper vinyl/silicone doll than resin. However, I talked to the DreamFairy seller and they offered to send me the attachments used for their heads to try and it worked. I was able to anchor the heads on that way. Also noting that the plastic version is technically hinge-jointed and not really ball-jointed, the difference being that BJDs are typically strung together. Another learning curve I wasn’t ready for.

In the process of making Rienna, I decided to get another Bomelon/DreamFairy hybrid, deciding I wanted to also use this sculpt to make another character, Talia.

I’ll kind of zoom ahead a bit here and there or this will be a pretty long post. I had the money so I also decided to acquire a generic 1/4 scale female doll and a 1/3 scale male, both plastic. I love both of them but I never named them or had any particular designs in mind for them either. However, they were important in helping me develop my comfort levels before taking the next big step.

I really wanted a mature and gorgeous adult male type doll at this point. The generic male was... pretty, but I was looking for more maturity. I ended up fixated on a Soom ID72 Hyperon sculpt. I also took a gamble and went with tan skin, although I was warned that darker colors were harder to get consistent results with. But I really saw my Maxim character in him so he was... my first official resin BJD.

Almost immediately, I found his adventurous counterpart Endramena in the Iplehouse SID Mari sculpt. Also, tan skin. Both characters grew up on an island nation, beaches and sunlight so it wouldn’t make sense to make them pale.

I hadn’t planned on getting any more dolls for characters in that story but ended up seeing Kaffir in the Soom SuperGem Dia sculpt.

I’m probably getting the order a little off at this point. I also acquired my Fairyland Minifee sculpts, Karsh and Celine, around the same time but I had saved up a lot of money working and it was around the start of the pandemic so I  had bought a bunch, didn’t realize my job would be shut down then stayed conservative about buying any for a while. At least until sheer boredom and desperation made me desperate for more.

The next doll I wanted was the Soom SuperGem Epidia, in dark brown skin. I developed a curiosity for skin types at that point but also had my eye on the Soom Zinc White Archer centaur sculpt and... got him too. 

At that point though, my family started making plans to move, so I stopped buying doll stuff for maybe six months to save for furniture and things we’d need there. Annnnd I already had more to pack than I cared to. It was easy to save when I thought about reducing what would need to be packed and carried. I actually ended up getting rid of quite a bit, just to avoid that as much as possible.

When I got to house number two, I didn’t even think about purchasing any for a long while either. Mostly, because I was sick of looking at boxes. Annnnnd then, well, my last post happened. Ordered six more diverse sizes and colors and sculpts of dolls. Once more a scattering of Soom, Iplehouse and Minifee because clearly I have a type. The diversion being my first Smart Doll, who... is not a BJD either, but a vinyl/silicone type with an articulated hinge skeleton.

Of course... I also have a collection of nendoroids, Barbies, and other generic dolls and even just heads that I’ve acquired along the way, but I’d need to have my order history open as a reference to track all of that. 

My collections have kept me hungry for projects, even when I haven’t had the drive to actually do them. I actually like that so many of them aren’t just book character projects or even get names, because they are there to alter according to mood. I’ve gone a tad overboard but not to where it’s a hindrance. It’s more like overpacking a bag. It’s a strain on space but you don’t truly regret having more than you need; better than having less.

I look forward to seeing what the latest ones become. As I work on Endramena and Maxim, they’re my free-play dolls. I can change their identity or look at any time. They’re not married to a specific idea.

There may be more still but at this point, I don’t foresee it. I’m quite knowledgeable on the selection of dolls out there and I don’t have any teasing me on a wish list. I’ve answered a slew of impulses and I feel a calm I haven’t felt in a long time. 

Time to enjoy the fruits of that journey.

Doll Days

 I had said I was done buying dolls last August, after I got my Soom Zinc White Archer centaur. Even once October came and another house gave me more room to grow, I hadn’t thought about buying more. New furniture and stocking a new house with creature comforts was on the top of the list.

But I was having a hard time working on any of my project ideas. As much as I love the new place, nothing is perfect and it’s even harder for someone like myself to adjust to big changes. It can be overwhelming on the senses and lend to a creeping anxiety I’m not even wholly aware of until I would snap at someone.

I decided I wanted a smaller doll, a 1/4, so I picked a Soom Soa. The seller even offered different skin colors so I chose a light purple. I knew I didn’t want to do custom clothes for her, since she wasn’t based off of one of my characters; just wanted to make her dark and lovely.

I had been going through Etsy and ended up buying a doll dress and even found a talented woman who did a custom color for one of her clothing sets so I got both. Without realizing the expensive dress did not fit any of my dolls because I didn’t see it was for a specific sculpt.

So. I ended up ordering a 1/3 Soom SuperGem Topaz to fit it. I didn’t have a wig or wefts I liked for her so her wig is still on its way.

 

So Endramena, who I originally wanted to try the dress for got the next best thing, the pant set that will be decorated later. The Soom Topaz will end up resembling my character Eden, who was my ice Queen well before Disney’s Elsa would be who she is forever compared to.

I had joined a doll group that is recast friendly and still fell in love with all of the Smart Dolls people were posting. She’s not actually a ball-jointed dolls at all but a soft silicone and vinyl sculpt with an articulated skeleton. Plus, it’s an anime style doll. Since it was once more ticking boxes of novelty... I ended up getting Athena.

And she has new clothes and shoes on the way, once more unplanned as a character.

I... wish I could say I was fulfilled at that. However, I got it in my head my purple girl could use a green alien rabbit boy buddy. At this point, I’m aware that I sound like I’ve completely lost my mind. I actually can’t remember which sculpt he is, a Lapin from what I do remember, but yeah. He’s on the way.

... Along with what I consider a ‘grail’ doll, which is doll community lingo for one that’s been sitting on your wishlist for some time. An Iplehouse EID Bichun. He’s the only one of the batch that I didn’t get a faceup for so I’ll be doing that myself.

But wait! There’s more... but this was kind of like a cherry on top. I happened to find a small but fully articulated baby dragon. So yeah. That had to happen. I’m still a fantasy author so I can’t do without my dragon.

That’s it though! But I can’t promise I’m done anymore. I still really want to do my dragon lady Esmerelda in doll form sometime. There are some characters I do purely as sentimental favorites, some that I just pictured as looking so awesome, I want that physical model.

And I’m not casting my bets that my stories will blow up to the tune of licensing figures and such. Why wait? Why bank it all on people loving what you love enough to see that day come? Why not make it happen?

And little by little. Endramena now has a headdress, but there’s still quite a bit of work left in doing her wig and outfit. I’m doing her book debut outfit, a swath of blue and gold, her shackles the jewels and adornments fit for a princess... but giving her no true joy at all. All the same, I believe this look suits her better than she knows. I gave her headdress the look of a dragon-themed helm so the stunning beauty of it wouldn’t hinder her on a battlefield. I’ve always adored the idea of the deadly beauty, using the unique strengths of feminine power to turn the tides. She doesn’t not need to stop the sword; just disarm the warriors to do her bidding.

As for Maxim, her one-armed guardian, he’s got quite a lot of accessorizing to go too. I did trim his wig so I need to secure it to his wig cap and then flock the close cut parts of his hair to his head. The flocking that I purchased before, while supposedly black, looked dark purple in sunlight so I ordered a few more small pots, hoping one will be a true black.

So, some of my dolls are a work in progress. Some are quite finished. Kaffir actually got his face-up and body blushing done since I moved here too so that’s one at least. So aside from Endramena and Maxim, the Bichun sculpt is the next biggest challenge. I went with premade outfits and wigs for my impulse dolls. 

I actually like that I have dolls with no set purpose. They can make for good models and help me with trying new things. Many of my character dolls will not be changing out of costume. While I do like to make their costumes removable just in case, they represent a realization of my writing projects.

If I had a whole room to dedicate to making every character I think up, I would. On days when I have no drive to function, just seeing them keeps me afloat. It’s not so much a materialistic nature as having the right stimulants to ground me.

I adore every part of where my talents want to manifest. That I can captivate anyone else is a bonus.

Time to Vax!

 I’ll admit, when March 19th rolled out the next round of candidates for the COVID vaccine, I was bummed a little too hard that it was for adults 40 and up... I’m only a few months away from 40! Come... on! But good news quickly followed; anyone 16 and up would be eligible on March 29th.

I got fire ants in my pants by the time March 28th arrived and went ahead to see if I could go ahead and schedule my appointment. At first, it was a bit overwhelming so I stuck to Kroger pharmacies. Only one was available in my search radius so I jumped on it and... scheduled!

Today was the date of my first shot and I was also happy to hear I was getting the Moderna vaccine. After researching all of them, I felt this one was more aligned with what I wanted. It had side effects I was already familiar with from getting my adult vaccines caught up two years ago and I liked where the effectiveness sat, as well as the mRNA. It’s likely my nephews will eventually get the Pfizer one, since that is the front runner in clinical tests for those under 16 at the moment, so we’ll have some diversity in the findings for herd immunity.

I have plenty of personal reasons for rushing to get it done. A process that gives hope for a return to normalcy, the amount of people around who still don’t wear masks, having a very temperamental immune system that sometimes dodges the big seasonal illnesses and other times makes me sicker than others for longer periods of time. Overall, I want to contribute to the goal of herd immunity. It’s worth the risk of stepping up. Enough of us have to step forward to race against the development of mutations and variants. I know my own family is less likely to ever do it unless someone they actually know steps up first. It’s less that I have always been a leader and more that I am not content to just follow.

Fully aware that no matter what choice we make these days, someone is always quick to pin you as a sheep. My friends, I have never been a sheep. I’ve had to mask to attempt to belong my whole life and I make a terrible sheep. I’m definitely not a wolf under the wool; more like a weird ass cat. One that started off feral, discovered they liked the domestic life but still gets the urge to explore the outdoors from time to time. But that’s okay; I won’t fight anyone on being a sheep/sheeple. It also secretly delights me that some people do perceive me as belonging. 

In any case... yeah, at this point, it’s about nine, ten hours since I took the plunge. There’s an expected soreness in my upper arm and... I’m so glad I’m not around people because my ass gas is absolutely foul right now. I feel a little fatigue and started to get a stuffy nose and dry cough, BUT. An allergy pill cleared that up quickly. That’s right, folks; don’t panic, it’s also allergy season! 

There may be more discomfort overnight and well into tomorrow but the worst of it should pass by the afternoon (the 24 hour window). A totally expected occurrence for a vaccine. And this mRNA one is actually pretty cool. It basically delivers a genetic message (hence the m and RNA) on how to build these S (spike) proteins like the coronavirus has. It’s basically instructing the cells to build these training dummies and wake up the antibodies, then identify them as the enemy. The first dose is the training phase. The second dose is then the real deal; the body is trained to go, so the simulated S proteins are reintroduced so that the buff and ready antibodies can go to war. This is why the second dose tends to get the most severe symptoms; however, we’re talking a day, maybe two, of discomfort while your body perfects its immune responses. If all goes well, the virus tires out and dies in the bodies of the ready hosts and there is little to no chance it can mutate or spread to weaker hosts. However, if the variants/mutations win too hard, then vaccines must be boosted and we must fight harder to achieve the hope of herd immunity. We must close as many doors as possible to weaken the virus’s ability to spread, mutate or even exist, so we need risk takers to step up.

I might have been one of the more cautious sorts in the past, but I am eager to restore my life to some sense of normalcy, to not put others at higher risk, no matter how much the sacrifices have inconvenienced me. I will continue to wear a mask as long as the healthcare system asks it of me. You could tell me my vaccine is 100% effective and I can’t get it, but there’s no guarantee I can’t spread it to the unvaccinated or immunocompromised. 

I’m not a saint either. I would not give a shit about spreading it to some asshole that hasn’t taken it seriously but it doesn’t work that way. There are people who genuinely cannot get vaccinated or are too compromised for it to work and we don’t get to choose who ‘deserves’ a dose of reality. But here’s the truth, it doesn’t cost me much to be safe. I’ve grown accustomed to wearing a mask when I go out around others. I’ve always been reasonably hygienic about hand washing and minimizing spread. Assholes can laugh all they want but I am kind enough to lose sleep over the harm I might do others. 

I mean, I’ll still smash my fist into the faces of anyone who crosses boundaries with me, but that takes quite a bit of pushing and you will not see it coming. For the most part though, I exist to get along with anyone. A bit of a hippie with a hell switch. 

All the same, today marked a day of hope. In a few weeks, I’ll endure a bit more discomfort, and maybe a couple weeks after, enjoy a sense of safety and even more hope. I’ll keep my fingers crossed that enough people see sense and we can beat this virus. If freedom is truly what my fellow Americans value, they’ll see this virtue of science as their ticket.

Before I go, I do want to add that it’s become increasingly clear to me that nurses don’t quite have adequate medical training; they are first and foremost trained in hospitality. I say this because I have heard quite a few accounts of nurses saying they had to get the vaccine but would not have if they knew they’d get such side effects. This is a real red flag that not all workers in the medical field have valuable knowledge in science or how vaccines work. Now, I do know that many nurses do have stellar education and advanced medical training (depending on their certification and experience) but despite the incredible respect I have for anyone in the current medical client, I highly urge people to take such statements with a grain of salt. Not a single one of my friends/colleagues who know their shit in the medical field has said this or any other vaccine is not worth the risk and inconvenience of an expected immune response. In fact, they are relieved they’ve experienced the discomfort, embracing it as a sign their immune system is prepared. While many caregivers may appear to be in a position to influence, be very careful not to form your opinions based on unfounded fears or discomfort. Due diligence with verified sources only! I hope that you are sensible enough to not be lured in by colorful or powerful languages. This is fine when reading fiction, but facts? Facts are often not going to regale you. They will sometimes even bore you, but that is reality. Sometimes, the truth is quite predictable and even isn’t the answer you want to hear. Science is truthful enough to admit it does not have all the answers but will tirelessly keep searching. It doesn’t fill in all the holes immediately because it needs to make anyone feel better.

Embrace the unknown. Take risks. And try to do no harm!