The Many Faces of Writers

After a long day of productive writing on a fun side story, I felt that intense urge to prematurely share the adventure... Once more hitting that frustrating wall belonging to every serious writer who self-publishes to market rather than throwing their first drafts on WattPad--I just can't. I can tell a friend or two, but the intimate thrill of the writing must still be refined into its intended finale before I take that leap.

The paradox begins to twist into my thoughts. Even though I blog in first person about myself or my methods, etc. I begin to feel as if my truest voice is growing in my fiction, my ideals, my most faithful words, my endless love for creation. I feel the frustration and confusion of reality start to untangle, the complex becoming understandable, my connection to reality stronger through my interpretation in fantasy. I don't feel this need to transform reality to cater to me, but rather, I become more peaceful in the acceptance that I can't control anything completely. I also have no temptation to disguise my real-life ideals, politics, or preferences to subliminally teach people or, worse, recruit them to think like me, or guilt my readers to agree with what I think might be good or bad.

Perhaps even more strongly since I've seen writers insist that writers have a responsibility to educate, when nothing can be further from the truth. Can it be a responsibility? Presented as non-fiction, certainly, but even then, it falls under personal responsibility for each person to remember you absolutely cannot believe everything you read, no matter how it is presented. Biases will always exist that will saw away the best intentions into so much dust.

For some in a state of mental simplicity, zen, whatever you want to call it, the easy answer is that all voices coming from you (barring crippling schizophrenia) are your true voice. However, I feel as if there is always a voice I associate myself with more and it's not always the one in our shared reality. Don't get me wrong--this isn't about retreating from reality. I can literally feel my brain working more clearly, cleverly, calmly in certain states. More often than not, it's while exploring internal processes than external stimuli.

Since I'm back at writing, I'll leave this at that. Thanks for reading!